You have to be strong enough to go home and cry.
Addiction runs in our family, but this was my daughter, and by far the hardest for me. It was devastating.
Rachael was always a very loving, smart child who never gave me any trouble. I first recognized she was using drugs when she was seventeen, but I realize now that I was blinding myself. She started much earlier. She began with pot, but quickly graduated to Oxy.
Rock bottom came after her father passed away. Her drug use intensified until one morning, I found her slumped over the toilet. Her blood pressure had bottomed-out and her brain activity stopped. Doctors told me she would not live.
It destroyed me. I blamed myself for being blind to it and enabling her by not putting my foot down earlier. Through blood transfusions and a miracle, she survived.
While she was in the hospital, I decided there was no coming home. I took her key away and sent her directly to treatment. At first, she resisted, but over time she became fully committed and was doing the treatment for herself. She completed a full-year program including halfway house. After that, she got her own apartment. I knew if I let her come back home, we would both fall back into old habits.
She now owns her own house and has an excellent job. The urge to use drugs is still there sometimes, but she is healthy. My proudest moment every year is when I present her with her sobriety medallion.
Today, Rachael has been clean for six years and she helps clients at Recovery Unplugged write their own addiction recovery story.